Busy

Contrary to popular belief, I am not a terribly busy person by the world’s standards. As a matter of fact, there’s often an awkward, uncomfortable moment when people with fewer children lay out their laundry list of things to get done, apologize for what must seem to me like small potatoes, and then stand in awe as I say that actually, I’m a little overwhelmed by their schedule. My days are rarely spent ferrying kids in a dozen different directions. I don’t volunteer in multiple locations. I don’t have a job outside my home.

I don’t like to be “busy.” I prefer to pace my days in a way that allows me to be fully here, now, in the present, enjoying the blessing in front of me. It’s a luxury, I know– but it’s not one that I take for granted. Instead, it’s one that I pursue and make a priority. Rushing out the door to a fabulous sport opportunity? I’d rather spend the time talking to my 12 year-old about the meaning of life. Sitting on the phone recruiting more bakers for a fundraising function? In this season of life, I’d rather play a board game with my littles.

But God has other plans, and rather than rolling dice and counting spaces, I’m balancing a full load of non-negotiables that keep me, well … busy.

We’ve checked a handful of biggies off of our list. May and June were full of milestones, and we crossed them all. But now, July is looming– and with it, an epic, 5-week farewell tour on the east coast. That means planning, packing, coordinating details, preparing kids to fly. There’s also the push to get everyone in for the last of their vaccinations, to get the dog cleared for travel, and to stock up on necessities to take with us to Nepal. Dental visits and eye appointments for 9 people. And selling our stuff. Getting our house ready to rent. Planning two year’s worth of curriculum– and buying it. There are plane tickets, hard choices, goodbyes.

I am busy.

Busier than I like to be, busier, maybe, than is healthy. But it’s where I find myself. And so …

So I try my best to find some semblance of peace in the midst of the chaos. I schedule an series of appointments, and then I read Milly Molly Mandy to the littles who have been patiently waiting. I research books, then I sit outside in the sun, with my knitting, where I can view the latest soccer match. I sort and fold clothes with a chatty teen at my side. I run children to appointments and stop for milkshakes on the way home.

This season will, in its time, pass. The next few months will snowball, with the activity escalating right up until the moment we step on the plane to Kathmandu. We will arrive, there will be more chaos, and then …

Then, I pray, I can return to the comfortable place where “busy” is something I don’t think of as being a description of myself. Where I can hear others speak of their commitments, but realize that my own fall far short.

 

Until then, I will keep stealing small islands of time in the midst of the many advancing requirements. I will savor the moments of quiet when and where they come. I will linger in the flashes of peace as they find me. And I will do what needs to be done.

 

(If you’re looking for a fabulous teaching on the value of Sabbath and the notion of “busy,” I highly recommend this sermon by our pastor and friend, Dr. Nate Hettinga.)