Jude is five today. Five. The enormity of that settled upon my shoulders last week, and has whispered at the edges of every moment since.
Jude is a thinker. Empathetic. Sensitive. He loves being outside in any and all weather, and he is happiest with a stick in his hand. He loves looking for insects and small critters. He falls asleep almost as soon as the lights are off most nights. Jude eats adventurously. He starts every day with a bowl of yogurt and rarely finds any dish to spicy or too exotic for his liking. He is terribly shy. His favorite books are Katy and the Big Snow and Curious George Rides a Bicycle. Jude loves painting, drawing, and heavy work like hauling huge tree limbs to the burn pile, or pushing large loads of mulch in his little red wheelbarrow. He laughs a lot. He is concerned for the safety of others and is an eager reporter of injustices everywhere.
He is our final, joyful caboose, and every bit doted upon as the much-loved baby of the family.
Happy birthday, Timothy Jude!
Our baby turned 5 in January and your opening thoughts capture my experience EXACTLY! It DOES whisper at the edges of every moment. I hear it in my voiced thoughts when I chat with my MOPS moms. I hear it when I connect with my hubby. I FEEL it….it’s so strange. I always wondered what “MOPS graduation” felt like….and why it should be celebrated. I trusted that it MUST be a thing…if everyone said so. Turns out, it IS a thing. A strange, permanent, not unwelcome, promising shift. I feel doors opening, possibilities unfolding, horizons stretching out…all of which I haven’t had the opportunity or taken the time to lift my eyes to see…until now. It’s strange. Different. I did not expect it to be this way. And motherhood surprises me, yet again…
You describe my feelings perfectly. I always feared I would feel some staggering sense of loss when my youngest was no longer able to be called a “baby.” Turns out, it’s just a new season, once in which the Lord offers just as much as he did in the years of little ones!