Nothing like going a whole month between posts. So much has happened that I really don’t know where to start, so I mentally winnowed the past four weeks to just three highlights: one farm-related, one that shifts our family dynamic, and one just for fun. Today, you get the first reveal. Come back tomorrow for the second.
The Farm
When we moved to the farm, there were three things I swore up and down I had no interest in. The first was owning a rooster. You know how that turned out; six months into chicken ownership, we bought Captain. He was a fabulous roo and, to be honest, I still miss his fancy blue self roaming the property and educating my kids on the not-so-polite mating rituals of poultry. (We actually bought a Blue Cochin chick this past spring in the hopes of perhaps a Lieutenant or Sergeant. Sadly, the chick didn’t make it to maturity.)
My second no fly was hogs. While I have a particularly sweet memory of picking up a trio of piglets at auction with my Papaw and being allowed to ride home in the back of the truck we know own with them huddled against me (I thought of myself as Fern for several blissful weeks), I also have not-so-sweet memories of the months that followed. If your closest contact with your pork chops has been through a plastic-wrapped styrofoam tray, allow me to share some of the nuances of life with swine. They can be quite stinky. You know this. They produce a lot of waste, and managing it (and the odor) requires a good bit of diligence unless you have a rather large land to pig ratio, with the emphasis on the land. Second, they are louder than you think. Hogs squeal, bark, grunt, and are otherwise noisier than you probably expect. Also, they are smart. Shockingly smart. They put every dog I’ve ever had to shame, and that says a lot. They learn, they reason, and they have definitive likes and dislikes. Which leads to another problem: they are escape artists. All that intelligence coupled with a curiosity to see the world (or at least get out of the pen they see day in and out) means that unless you can pretty much count on at least one episode where you are playing a game of catch the piggie. And finally, hogs can be mean. Again, they’re smart. All those brains make them mercurial from time to time. And a mad animal weighing in at 300+ pounds is no trifling thing.
So yeah, we bought some pigs.
The pigs are a cross between Old Spot and Large Black, and have been named Crispy Bacon, Tasty Ham, and Pork Butt. Yes, there are unreasonable amounts of giggling every time someone under the age of 19 gets to say “Pork Butt.” No, I’m not even trying to get it under control. Pigs are a lot of work, and everyone has already been pulling their weight in this newest enterprise. If they get a little bit of happy while shoveling loads of mulch into a pig pen, who am I to complain?
I’m not too proud to admit that these little critters have been highly entertaining. The runt (Tasty Ham) is cute, and the kids are all smitten. Birdie and Jude did their presentations at CC on them. John Mark has been adamant about joining his dad in the chores that pertain to them, right down to the scrubbing of the feeders and waterers which is frankly kind of gross. Simon is fond of taking them treats. And Phin likes to watch them but is otherwise unimpressed.
So yes, we are now pig farmers.
My third no fly zone, by the way, was cattle. At this rate, I guess we’d better start fencing.